Retro-blogging. That's right, I started it.

I'm about to post some stuff I wrote a while ago. Or have been working on for a long time.

I’m the slowest blogger ever – I’m like the anti-blogger. In fact I think I just invented something, and it's called retro-blogging. If you’re supposed have a thought and then post it, well, I like to have a thought and then sit on it for a year.

Some of the stuff sucks [for me, hopefully not for you, my three dear readers]. I mean, hey, it was January, time to write some more about how much I miss my mom! Because guess what – you don’t get over the loss, motherfuckers!

Look, most of this stuff I put off posting because who *really* wants to write about their Botox-fueled vanity, their fear of their son dying, or their dead mom? It might make me cry and I FUCKING HATE that! I hate crying!

And then some of this stuff ... I have good intentions, but the milestone passes me by [see reference to slow blogging above] and then it would just seem silly. So in the spirit of retro-blogging, I bring you...

... last year's Valentine's Day! Just in time for this year's Valentine's Day! RIGHT ON, BITCHES!